Time, Goals and Learning

Here are some of random thoughts for the day....
Before I got married I had a lot of me time. I tried hard to use it effectively and to make the most of the time I did have. I spent time with some of my favorite people, studied (both the gospel and for all those silly degrees), went to the temple, sewed, gardened and otherwise "filled" my time with whatever I could. Today I don't go looking for things to do, I do still get to hang out with some of my favorite people (some are far away though) but not nearly as much as before. My time is most of the time consumed by my job, family, calling, and so forth. As I was thinking about this the other day I realized how grateful I was/am for the time that I did have. I grateful that I learned so much about how to live, struggle, overcome, persevere and enjoy the peace, happiness and joy that those things bring.

Rob likes to tease me that he is always waiting on me - I don't think that is true! My general response is that I waited on him for so long that he can wait a few minutes for me. Rob also likes to point out to me that I am not a patient person - when I want something to happen I want it happen now. I have to admit that I have to adjust myself all of the time so that I don't get too impatient. Sometimes I feel like we wait around and wait around for something to happen to us, other times we work really hard to make something happen in a certain time period (like the young adult that gives themselves until the middle of June to get married). What I have learned over and over is that the Lord is in charge of all of this. He has a plan for you and me and that plan often times is not on my timeline and often times I grumble about how it would be nice to be _____ fill in the black (be married, be pregnant, graduate, have....). What I also know is that there is a reason for things to happen in a certain manner at a certain time. So the goals that I set today are very different than the ones I set a year ago and most definitely than the ones I set 10 years ago. My very wise Mama once told me that when you get married that your goals change, what is important to you changes. As is most often true she was right -- while not lots of my goals needed to change they did anyway and in great ways.

One of the things that I wanted most while single was someone to talk with, counsel with and make hard decisions with - a companion. Thankfully I can say that I received that, that my Heavenly Father knows me better than I do and sent the right man to marry. With this blessing has come some learning. When you are single for 34 years you grow to do things in a certain manner, have certain ways of doing things, expect certain things, etc. So, the last 10 months has been a learning experience for me. I have to say that Rob is a better communicator (especially when upset), that he is able to put emotion aside (much better than I) and that we can work together very well. I have learned in such a different way that before I was married. As I was thinking about time and goals and learning I am so grateful that putting all three together in the last year has lead me to grow and stretch to become something new. I am hoping that new thing is a better me, a more focused me - at least that is the goal! :)