When I was reading this morning the thought of having a soft and teachable heart kept coming up. So then I started thinking about my present circumstances and how I want to be the best mom possible and started making connections in my head. In an attempt to gather the thoughts I am going to write them down – warning – t hey may not make sense to others!
Mothering is a very humbling experience. Even for those who have spent their entire lives studying, working and being around children it is an adjustment. Even for those that want desperately to be the best mother they can be it is challenging and in the end very humbling. Like previously stated in another blog I thought I understood something about how to be a mom – of course I was wrong but I thought I did. The line that comes up again and again in my head is from the movie “Yours, Mine and Ours” the original with Harry Fonda and Lucile Ball. At the beginning of the movie she is telling her story about losing her husband and moving her children to get a new start. She says something about how it seemed that the kids were more worried about losing their friends than the lose of their father and then she says “it took me a while to realize how little I knew about children, especially my own.” In the movie and real life (it is based on a real couple who end up with 20 kids) she is the mother of 8 children then and then gains 10 more. Oh so humbling to realize that I know nothing but nice to know that others have felt the same.
So why the soft heart? When teaching my laurels in Columbia I taught a lesson about the Holy Ghost (I think – I looked on line and couldn’t find what I was looking for). The quote talked about how when we get frustrated, lose our temper, have a hard heart, turn red faced, etc that we lose the presence of the Holy Ghost in our lives. It was a powerful quote and I should have written it down but I didn’t. We talked with the girls about why it is important to have a soft heart and my friend Amy shared a sweet story about her 4 year old son. He was playing outside and had been asked to come in and he refused. Amy asked several more times while trying to prepare dinner and each time the answer was no. He planted himself on the patio and refused to move. So Amy went out to talk with him and try and figure out why her normally compliant 4 year old was being so obeisant. After a little talking she left him with a come in and do your chores or insert the consequence. After about 10 minutes she looked out and he had a big smile on his face and got up to come in. When he came in she reminded him that there was a consequence for his behavior and what would need to happen next. He went and did whatever it was. Later when putting him to bed she asked him why he had acted like that. He said well my heart was hard – I didn’t want to do what you wanted me to do. Amy said, ok what changed your mind. He replied that he had prayed about it, prayed that his heart would be soft so he could do what mommy wanted. I remember how powerful of a lesson it was for all of us – the bible says and a child shall lead them. Peyton lead us that day and has lead me since when I think about praying for a soft heart, a teachable heart that can pray to do what Heavenly Father wants me to do. Thanks Peyton!
Another quick story – several years ago we were doing the annual acting out of the Christmas story at my parents house. My nephews, Andrew and Jacob, and my brother Nathan were playing the wise men. Jacob lovingly took his gift and placed it at the feet of Mary. He was happy and content – a perfect little wise man at 4. Later we learned that he thought he was taking his actual gift and giving it to baby Jesus – something he did willingly and lovingly. What a sweet example of laying everything at the feet of Jesus. I love you Jacob – you are an awesome example! I hope and pray to have such a soft heart someday – to become like a small child as the scripture says.
"If you want something to last forever, you treat it differently...It becomes special because you have made it so." ~ - F. Burton Howard
I love this quote above. Motherhood is just that – something special. Now all I have to do is remember that teaching them about keeping the bathroom clean or least not smelling like pee has to be part of that the teaching them to clean it right part is as precious as anything. I will have to pray really hard for that one. 
I also really love the quote below.
President Spencer W. Kimball instructed us on what we should pray about: “We should express joyful and sincere gratitude for past blessings. The Lord has said, ‘And ye must give thanks unto God in the Spirit for whatsoever blessing ye are blessed with.’ (D&C 46:32.) A wonderful and assuring spirit comes over us as we express sincere gratitude to Heavenly Father for our blessings—for the gospel and the knowledge of it that we have been blessed to receive, for the efforts and labors of parents and others in our behalf, for our families and friends, for opportunities, for mind and body and life, for experiences good and helpful throughout our lives, for all of our Father’s helps and kindnesses and answered prayers.
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